Corned Beef

Get it while it's hot!

Article HERE

In 2008, when cows were added to the endangered species list, many areas saw a rise in counterfeit corned beef on the black markets. This fake corned beef was in actuality just meat from pigs who had been beaten to death with corn cobs to give their meat the musty aroma of a corn field. While similar in texture and feel to real corned beef, corned pork is said to in fact taste like smegma. As a result of the increased demand for legitimate corned beef, prices have skyrocketed such that corned beef is quickly becoming a commodity of the social elite alongside caviar, truffles, and unicorn belly button. In response to inflated prices, McCormick released a corned beef extract, allowing consumers to enjoy the flavor of corned beef in nearly any dish for a fraction of the price.

UPDATE: Edit was revised after 20 minutes with the comment, "removing vandalism."